You feel you have already done everything possible? When you try so hard but it's not enough? When you feel like disappearing but there's no escape? Well, when that happens, you create a blog and hope that more than one person sees it. Because you are writing with your heart. You're opening yourself to people. Like I'm opening myself to you. Life in New York isn't so perfect as it seems. Specially in Mahantans elite, where people think that money and power are better than personality and honesty. Well I'm part of this elite. But I don't think like them. Before, I wanted to be queen, but now I realize that every queen falls from her thrown. You can make people love you, but you can make them fear you. Because one day, they will realise that they don't need you and then, they wont fear you anymore. I've choosen not to be queen. Just to live my life and make people love me for who I am. Monarchy isn't easy. Be a queen isn't also. But be nice and convice people that monarchy only works in films, isn't so hard. Or at least I hope so. Life can be as in films, but you need to be the protagonist of your own story. And that is what I'm trying to do.
Kisses,
Blake
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